writer’s block…

I have just come to realize this post is really about nothing. It makes no sense whatsoever. Maybe I’m trying to garner sympathy. Pity my writing isn’t sobby!

I am one of those people known to suffer from very prolonged and frequent writer’s blocks. I just find it more comforting to express my rants through the visuals scribbled in my journal. Sometimes when I’m feeling particularly “ranty” I conduct a fervent screaming match in my head, which after finding peace eventually goes off to sleep and I am left in the dark, searching for phrases and words that never come.

These days there have been lots of moments to feel “ranty” about; the Lahore shooting, the crumbling economy [even though us teacher's have not felt the crunch, thank God for that], apartment renting, trip planning, weight managing, migraine handling etc. Sadly the list becomes more trivial as it goes on. I have never been able to handle rantiness. I fear it makes me sound whiny and ungrateful; and even though I get massively irritated at people who think ranting is being ungrateful, I can’t bring myself to stop disliking it. I am such a judgmental – emphasis on the mental – fool.

I hate Friday’s. Dealing with an over hyper bunch of sixth graders in the early afternoon is most migraine inducing and drains me physically. I don’t blame them for being so excitable. Who wouldn’t jump up and down at the thought of the glorious weekend ahead.

So my work day ended with a bunch of kids asking me if I watch American Idol. After giving into the pressure I replied yes ofcourse I do. “Miss aren’t you too old to watch it” to which I reply “Aren’t the judges too old to judge?” Satisfied with that, they move onto to ask me who my favourite contestant is. Adam Lambert and Danny Gokey ofcourse, I smiled. “Miss, we love you! We knew it.” A few girls cheer thrilled with my choice. One solemn faced boy quietly states his opinion. “Scott Macintyre will win.” I looked at him and replied that yes he might as he too was very good. The boy continued seriously, “America will vote for him. He will get the sympathy votes.” When I told him sympathy was short lived and after a while people would really go for the more outstanding singer, he looked at me and his eyes said “Maybe. We’ll see!”

~ by maya on March 13, 2009.